Re-evaluating my goals.

My plan to speak at pendulum summit got derailed, for the past few months.

I set an audacious goal, and didn’t really know what I was getting myself in for.

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Just like all goals, plan A didn’t work also plan b, c,d, and e. But now finally after trailing and fail-learning and a bit of de-motivation, I am getting the picture back of what I wanted 9 months ago.

I can see myself speaking on stage and the energy in the place being off the charts. I know the type of energy I want, because I’ve was a DJ, and I know when a place is electric. 3 or 4 thousand people, with a real drive, to be the best that they can be. Just even saying this pumps me up.

thinkbigger

I got derailed like every one, my goal was going to take a lot more effort than I thought. But that is the mark of a real goal. Something that will grow you. I had all the pieces but had no idea how long and how to put them together.

My naive assumption at the start of the year was, I’d put out a bunch of videos and get traction, and that was it. Haha. So funny now. Totally delusional. But again that is the mark of a true goal.

So, I’ve melted my own head over, and over, just like every entrepreneur, and it didn’t seem as much fun, as it originally did. It started feeling like it was going to be a lot of hard work.

Hard work

My plan originally was to do a bit of online marketing, and get a job with Pendulum Summit doing marketing, network with all the top people, and develop an opportunity that way.

What has come about, is I’ve had to start a media company, to build my own brand, which still doesn’t exist. So I’ve had to do a lot of study, and growing, than originally planned.

I started a meet up group,(The Epic Life Group) because I needed experience as an actual speaker. Yea that’s how delusional, this goal was. I fucking love it. Totally nuts.

Because I got disillusioned by the scale of things, my energy started to go, and I realized, I had a lot less time, than I originally thought. I was aiming to have all my stuff together at the end of the year, and I’d get a place to speak. But thanks to DJ and Journalist, Mark Kavanagh, I realized I had a lot less time. I actually had to get my shit together months in advance, because that is when they would finalize the lineup. Yea as I said I was delusional. Haha

Time

So through setting up the Meet-up group, that became much more interesting, and of much more value, than speaking at pendulum summit. I was getting in a small way, what I was aiming for in speaking at Pendulum.

Goo enemy.png

I said to myself, sure if I just build this group to thousands of people, I wont need pendulum.

So I carried on with that vision for a few months and had to think about growing the group, so I started reading lots of books, and marketing stuff, primarily @garyvee and today I realized, that I was struggling with my marketing message.

I realized that I had no direction, for what I was doing, I lost my north star. My vision had evaporated.

I was reading this stuff to grow the group, but to what end. It was vague and mushy.

Lost vision

Over the past few months, I had felt this vagueness, but I had no idea what it was. I went from being proactive, to just reading stuff that seemed like being productive, but it wasn’t leading anywhere.

I am reminded again, and again, that we have to have a north star, a destination, a goal because, that puts what we are doing, now, in context, and gives what we are doing, now, purpose.

north-star-filter

I was proactively lost.

I can even see it in the epic life group, I had lost that drive to grow, by being vague, and the group, I feel,could feel that too. Every bit of content I was putting out was great, but it lacked that bit of drive, and conviction, that direction. What we are all doing this for. We want epic lives, that is why, we are here, and that energy, was faltering.

doepicshit

I understand on a whole new level, the purpose of goals, so much more now. Goals are not to be attained, but they are there as tools to help you grow.

The goal itself is irrelevant, the journey is the most important thing. It is who you become as a result of your journey, that is most important. But! the goal gives you direction.

This goal has gone from being something fun, to something much more serious, it is now become a mark of my growth, as a man, a person, as a person who can make a difference, to his own life, and as a result the people around him.

The goal has gone from being a selfish one, to one that I hope will empower others.

Get over myself

I know now, that I am mad late, on speaking at pendulum, but miracles happen every day.

I am re-energized, and clear again on what I want to do, and why. We all go through these processes. If you are to take one thing away from this, is just keep going, keep moving forward, and things will become clear eventually.

Clear Vision Clear Reults

If  I had have stopped, I would not have a second chance now, and I gave myself that second chance.

Second chances

My energy and clarity is back.

I see myself in the Dublin Exhibition Center speaking to 3 thousand people, and bringing them on a journey that empowers the fuck out of them. I see the place going nuts, for themselves, because they will see how far, they have come, through my story.

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If I can be so delusional, and keep going, so can anyone. I can tell you now, I am 100% a better person for all the effort I have put in. Win, loose, or draw I have grown, and that is the real purpose of goals.

Feel awesome2

I can not go back to who I was, and one way or another, I am going to have better things because of this.

I look forward to meeting you on our Epic Journey’s

 

Setting Goals The Right Way!

What you want is who you want to become.

But it’s very important you set this up right.

Too many people set goals for themselves that actually work against them. I want to be Being rich is a state of mind.rich by September 11th 2015. This goals is driven by pain. I don’t have enough money now, so I want to be rich. You can almost feel the reaction, it’s like a pull back from a hot stove. It is vague, even if this person made a million, what is rich? What people want is feelings I want to be happy, that is what this person is really saying. Which is driven by, I’m not happy, I have too many bills to pay.

When we start to listen to our words, and listen to the deeper meanings of them, we start to see how we have been working against ourselves. Do you think that this person who wants to be rich is motivating himself by saying I want to be rich, I want to be rich, I want to be rich? Or is he beating himself up by saying I’m poor, I’m poor, I’m poor. Can you see this pattern in people you know?

What about people who want to be successful?

Or Skinny

Or lose weight

What are these people really saying to themselves?

The funniest of them all is “I have to be more positive”, “I have to be more positive”. What is this really saying? does it feel good, does it feel positive?

How many people do you know who are tortured by what they are saying to themselves? Are you one of these people?Torturing yourself

Let’s break the cycle of pain. Let’s go from being reactive to proactive.

What can you do now, to improve your wealth?

What can you do now, to improve your health?

What can you do now, to improve your fitness?

What can you do now, to improve your attitude?

How do these statements make you feel? Do you feel empowered? Why is that? Is it because these questions assume you can do something?

Can you feel the difference in how the language makes you feel?

What would happen if you only focused on what you can improve? Would you make more progress easily? Would it be more rewarding? Would you feel better about yourself? would you be working with yourself instead of against?

Let’s set an effective health goal.

The old way would have been. I want to lose weight by September 30th… so I have to starve myself until then. Does this feel nice? does this motivate you? Or are you like me and feeling tightness in your chest at the thoughts of it.

Now the effective way.

What do you really want in life? Do you want to be skinny? So people will accept you so that you will like yourself? Will people like you if your sick miserable and unhealthy? Will you like yourself, if you are sick miserable and unhealthy? But your skinny right? 😉Skinny and unhealthy

Or do you want to be the best you, you can be? Full of energy enthusiasm, vitality and light. That loves life, themselves, and everyone around them, because they feel so good every day?

Which sounds better to you?

What can you do now to move towards that goal? I hope you’re not saying stop eating shit food? Does that feel good to you? No? Does it feel like your criticizing yourself? Well then it’s not supporting you. What would happen if you said I can eat more veg today? How does that statement feel to you? Is it better? is it focused on what will actually make you healthy?

What would happen if you completely ignored the negative stuff and just started eating Great foodgreat food and exercising? What would happen if you just started being nice to yourself and supporting yourself?

Do you want to become a person who loves them self fully and feels amazing all the time.

I think that is a pretty awesome goal.

Can you start moving towards that now?

 

 

 

 

 

I want more money

As we said in the previous posts it is our purpose to go for what makes us happy and what makes us happy is going for what we want.

Dollars funnel.

We looked at how to start defining what you want.

BUT!!! Most people are blinded by one thing, MONEY!!!

We all want more money, but why do we want it? it’s just a piece of paper… right?

Actually people never want more money; they want the security it brings, the things it brings, or the freedom it represents. I definitely want money for these reasons.

However money in and of its self does not bring happiness. So many people think it does. But it’s what you do with money that is the real fun, going on jet skis, meeting up with friends, going to clubs and buying new cars.

But what we do for money often isn’t as much fun. So if we look at our experiences working for money rarely gets us what we really want and to be honest working harder at what we are doing isn’t really attractive enough to warrant the extra money it will bring. So we get caught in this trap of wanting money and not wanting to do our job (Just Over Broke)

I’m sure you have had this thought, I have many times, when I get a bit more money, I will have the money to think about what I want. Can you see how you will never get what you want by thinking this? On one hand your trapped by not wanting to work more because you do not enjoy your job and on the other hand you are not allowing your self to think about fun stuff because you have no money. Loose loose.

What can we do differently?

Be A Fun Mum

First and foremost we have to stop looking at money as the thing we want, it blinds us to what we really want.

When you decide what you want, like a car, a house or more holidays, money then follows automatically. Its mad but I’ll prove it.

By wanting a house you may notice an opportunity to win one or build one or some opportunity that I cannot even imagine, but you start seeing opportunities.

The money follows automatically because you have set a target a reason to work harder or think differently, you start to generate ideas, it gets your imagination fired up and as a result your enthusiasm grows, you start to have a reason to work, it makes your job a bit more enjoyable. It’s mad but it’s true. I’m sure you have done this many a time, when you decided to go on holidays. oh I need a bit more spending money? I definitely have.

So the desire for the thing automatically creates more money in your life, because you are more enthusiastic about life.

having-fun-with-friends

What if you decided to think outside the box and ask a different question altogether. What if you wanted a job that was fun? That also made you money? What if you decided, I want a job that was fun that was rewarding, would you automatically turn up on time and be a great employee, would you get a raise for being such a good employee?

Money is just a tool to get what you want. Money follows what you want to do in life; it follows your enthusiasm, never ever the other way around.

Try it now ask yourself some questions and brain storm ideas. What sorts of jobs are there out there that are fun? What do I enjoy already? The more of these sorts of questions we ask the better the answers we will get.

There are people making lots of money doing crazy stuff, from wood work to selling stuff for amazon.com, to life coaches and playing guitar. You can make lots of money doing anything. I know people who love ironing and make extra cash ironing. (nut-cases) I’d sooner coach someone, but we are all different.

So How much fun and enthusiasm do you want in your life?   having-fun-25 

Look at this cop.

These are the facts about money it is only a tool, like a hammer. You use a hammer to hammer in nails when you’re building a house, you use money to pay someone to hammer in those same nails if you don’t have those skills. It is neither good or bad it is just a tool. You can use it to kill someone, just like a hammer, or you can use it to build a shelter, to save some one.

This is the human bit though. We tie money to survival, because we do need it to live. But this is where money starts getting tied to our beliefs. Money represents how we value our selves. We have all been in a situation in work where we say I’m worth more than this boring job, paying me next to nothing, for all the work I’m doing. But then we say, I’m no good at anything else, so I won’t get money, or a good paying job elsewhere. Generally this sort of statement is made because people don’t believe in themselves, which is a representation of their self worth. Basically I’m not good enough. So the less you are paid the less you value your self (as long as you are not enjoying your job, if you do enjoy it your getting paid in enjoyment)

Tomorrow how to build self belief and self worth.